Underperforming Since 1985

It seems that those lists of 25 things have blown up on Facebook, and I’ve even seen them leaking into some of the blogs I read via my google reader. I love to read random things about people (there’s a whole argument to be made about the fact that the things aren’t really random at all but are carefully selected factoids, but I digress), and so I’ve been devouring these memes like crazy.

What strikes me as odd, however, is that I haven’t been tagged once during this entire meme explosion. Not once, y’all. I don’t know what the odds are of that happening, but they have to be like, one in…some really big number. I’ve never really understood that whole odds thing, anyway.

(As I write this, The Boy is standing over my shoulder, urging me to mention the fact that he has been tagged a shit ton of times. Jerkface.)

So I was thinking, maybe I’d just post my 25 completely not-random things on here? At this point, the meme has been done by so many people that rebellion has set in and people are abstaining from doing it. Therefore, by participating in the 25 things meme, I’m actually counter-counter-culture? (Does that revert it back to mainstream culture? Does it matter?)

Well, Gentle Readers, here goes nothing.

1. I was born on Mother’s Day, at 5:11 in the morning. I’ve been announcing my presence at the most inopportune times ever since.

2. I had the same best friend from 1st grade until 9th grade. She and I still see each other from time-to-time, but we aren’t close like we used to be. Siamese twin close, you know? It can’t sustain itself. Also, we’re very different people.

3. Close friends are something I take very seriously, and therefore do not have a large number of people that I file under “close friend” in my life.

4. People, in general, annoy me. Especially in large groups.

5. When I’m asked why I became a teacher, I usually deadpan, “For the summers off.” This is not actually the reason at all, and I will probably teach during the summer for the next several years.

6. I abuse sarcasm. I don’t see that changing any time soon.

7. When I was in high school, I went through a phase where I quoted movies and TV shows almost constantly. It got so bad that my mom would ask, “What’s that from?” the second I’d finished saying something whether or not it was a Clementine original (I’m very creative, you know). Amusing, it was not.

8. I have a hard time choosing favorite bands or movies, but I have no trouble selecting books and TV shows. Veronica Mars always tops the TV list, and The Portable Dorothy Parker has been my number one literary obsession for years.

9. I really like music, but I don’t consider myself to be a snob. My music tastes change with my moods (which are likely to change without any notice, as The Boy can attest), and I tend to prefer pop music to sing along to in the car. I also tend to favor female singers with self-deprecating lyrics, so I guess it’s pretty much a crapshoot.

10. Speaking of music, I’ve been to more than one Hanson concert. They were my first real music obsession (no, Raffi doesn’t count), and I maintain that they’re talented musicians, which is an argument I will keep making until I die.

11. When I get sick of the music on my iPod/the radio, I’ve been known to listen to a large amount of NPR. I like the station in general, but Wait, Wait Don’t Tell Me! is one of my favorite things in the world.

12. My workouts usually take place on a stationary bike, and while I love to read while pedaling, I find that it slows down my RPMs, so I usually watch TV on DVD instead.

13. I just finished the first season of Gossip Girl and find myself thinking about the show and the characters more than I’m comfortable with.

14. I collect recipes obsessively. My favorite recipes to try out involve baked goods, but I’m trying to get into savory recipes to expand my abilities in the kitchen.

15. Easter candy is my favorite candy. I can’t explain it. I love Starburst Jellybeans, chocolate eggs, marshmallow Peeps. The pastel colors probably don’t hurt, either.

16. I’m a self-professed Jossverse fan.  I actually own a “Joss Whedon is My Master Now” t-shirt.  It’s only seen the light of day once, and that was the night I went to see Serenity.  It was a theater full of Joss-nerds.  There was no judgment.

17. Sometimes I get up early in the morning so I can watch the back-to-back episodes of Saved By The Bell on TBS.  Then I go back to bed.

18. I feel like this list is turning into a list of all my guilty pleasures.  In a way, I guess it kind of is.  It’s as though my life is full of these elusive, yet fragile things.

19. When it comes to relationships, I tend to favor long-term monogamous relationships and then long periods of being single.  I do not have a lot of ex-boyfriends, and the longest I’ve ever been single is three and a half years.

20. I’m not on speaking terms with any of my exes.

21. While I tend to judge people fairly harshly, I am incredibly adept at reading a person.  My impressions of people are rarely wrong, but when they are, I freely admit it.

22. I used to write poetry until I realized that I was terrible at writing poetry.  Now I write mostly unfinished fiction of the mediocre variety.

23. I played with Barbies much longer than my peers did.  I’m not going to give you an exact age-range, but I will tell you that the last time I was caught playing with them, it was by my younger sister, who had come home from a date.

24. She sat down without a word and joined me.

25. I pick my nose every day.  It’s so satisfying, and it’s definitely my grossest habit.
Well, there you have it, gentle readers.  It took me much longer to put this list together.  I hope you enjoyed it.  I know I did.